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this is one of my favorite recipes!

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Here’s the Thing About Writing

This is the most embarrassing thing I can admit: I really want to be a writer. And a funny, clever one. The idea of writing is appealing to me, sadly, not just as an expression of creativity, but also vanity.

I have a lot of ideas for stories, because I do have a creative side. Like, I want to write a sitcom about a girl returning to her hometown after a serious stint in rehab. I want to write it hilariously about how serious her sobriety is but also have her dealing with her asshole, alcoholic family. And I want to call it “Bottled Up!” (may or may not have the exclamation point)

I want to write sketches about the house-decorating market coming to a global economic collapse and stars rise up to save our home goods. Beyonce starts her own good quality but affordable line called, “Bed, Bath, and Beyonce”. And her face will be on everything. And when you lay your head to rest, Beyonce will sing you ‘Halo’ in your ear. 

I watch shows like ‘30 Rock’ and ‘Community’ and they are so fucking clever, it makes me so bad want to be a part of that - to make people feel that good watching a show that is so funny. But I’m not a Tina Fey, or Amy Poehler, or Dan Harmon, you know? Some people are so smart and so powerful with their creativity they can create entire worlds that change our world. Like, J.K. Rowling invented Quidditch - which really is kiiiind of a dumb game. And it involves riding a flying broomstick, and words like “quaffle” - and people actually get together and play that shit. In REAL life. With Brooms. That can’t fly.

I’m not that creative, and I think it’s because I take comedy a little too seriously (it’s an important part of my life - in a possible [Ed. Note: and unhealthily] religious manner. The kind of game I could come up with would be something more like, Solitaire. It requires thinking, some luck, a moderate amount of fun, and at the end, things are organized - win/win/win*(because its a personal victory).

I don’t know, I think I’m too nice and tried to be mean and snarky for awhile and it just wasn’t a good color on me.  

Filed under filing this under: high-deas i just want to make jokes on tumblr i guess

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Have any of you had to go without Internet for over a week recently? You kind of lose the ability to know what’s going on in the world. Like, I didn’t even know there was a vote in North Carolina (read a book!). Here’s where I insert my opinion, here’s where I acknowledge how sweet everyone is and how they all really hoped that NC would have been more progressive, here’s a little joke that cuts tension, and finished! All I could think when I looked at tumblr on my phone this morning was, “what vote?”.

Have any of you had to go without Internet for over a week recently? You kind of lose the ability to know what’s going on in the world. Like, I didn’t even know there was a vote in North Carolina (read a book!).

Here’s where I insert my opinion, here’s where I acknowledge how sweet everyone is and how they all really hoped that NC would have been more progressive, here’s a little joke that cuts tension, and finished!

All I could think when I looked at tumblr on my phone this morning was, “what vote?”.

Filed under i mean its kind of like the dolphins going to the superbowl